Whose plan was this anyway?

If you know me - you know that I am a planner - I make lists; and if I happen to do something that isn't on my list - honestly, I have been known to write it on there - just so I can cross it off (dork). 

I do not usually allow myself to enjoy doing something, unless I am as prepared as I think I possibly can be... it really doesn't matter what it is. I want to know what is coming up, what is going to happen, at what time, and I want to know what I should be doing, how I might feel and even think of all the ways I might have to be prepared to be flexible if something .... *gasp*... changes. Yes this applies to most aspects of my life..., for example, I plan two weeks of meals at a time on a certain budget amount; and actually had to calm myself down when I got to the grocery store; plan in hand - only to realize the sale flyer I had used expired the week before. I was ashamed, panic set in... and then I laughed at myself. 

Why do I put myself through so much stress. And, it really requires a lot of energy to try to plan every aspect of my life! It turns out the older I get the more I realize that not only does my life not really look like I had "planned" but, if I look closely, its even better than I had planned. 

No- I do not have three or four children; no -I haven't started running daily, no- I haven't paid off my student loans, no- I haven't written a best selling novel, no - I haven't traveled to Ireland & Spain with my husband... the planned life goes on and on... 

However - I do have the greatest husband God could have ever given me; and while marriage isn't really much like I "planned" (haha) - it has provided a lot more richness than I ever expected. I have been able to listen to the Word preached in several churches all over the country and even online when we weren't at a church home. We have been fortunate to always have housing, food, family that loves us (all over the country) & friends who we can pick up with, even after long amounts of time; without feeling awkward or ashamed for "being very busy"...

If I am honest, not too much in my life has turned out the way I "planned" or had hoped it would. And let me be real honest; thats a really great thing - my life has turned out pretty good so far, if I could just quit planning so much and go enjoy it. 

I do not think its bad to have goals or things you want to accomplish - I just need to remind myself to not always try to plan everything in my life - and enjoy the blessings God has given me and embrace the things He has for me to do. His plan is probably way better than mine anyway... :)